A Note from Maura
Reflecting on 18 years of service to the community, TAP Unlimited has welcomed, embraced, accompanied and lost many individuals with aphasia. It’s a reality that reminds me that being called “A Family” is both a responsibility and a blessing. I’ve watched clients as they became empty nesters, welcomed grandchildren, lost spouses, celebrated landmark anniversaries and gathered together in the best and worst of times. Yes, it’s heartwrenching to lose a family member, one that entrusted you with their story and welcomed you along for the challenges and triumphs they’d experience along the way.
And every now and then, when you have filed away a chart, smiling warmly that you were given the opportunity to know them, you open your email to find a gift… the gift of their narrative. Today’s story is just that. A reflection on a life well lived and greatly loved, and a life that intersected with TAP after a stroke the same year that TAP was born. Leon Bowman was one of TAP’s first clients, but even as he regained so much of his communication, receiving comments like “Why do you come to TAP? You sound great!”, he didn’t stop attending TAP programs. His gentle, caring nature and welcoming smile was a staple in our Durham group for almost two decades. His daughter shares her memories of TAP and of her sweet father-daughter bond. And we are all so grateful for that!
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Leon Bowman (as shared by his daughter, Tamara Bowman)
I’m offering my thoughts a little late, but they have not faded despite the years. Eighteen years ago, while at work as a physician, I received a call that would change my life forever, but would change my Dad’s life even more.
I was given the news that my father had suffered a large temporoparietal stroke (affecting the language center). He was in the neuro-ICU and ultimately, regained most of his ability to understand spoken language, but was left with expressive aphasia, making it difficult for him to speak his thoughts. I watched helplessly as my Dad struggled to communicate with his family and make his needs known, and as my mother fought to take care of him and stay strong for all of us.
Being a physician, I felt like I should be able to do something to make things better, but it just didn’t work that way. He began speech therapy and through his therapist was introduced to TAP. I met Maura when she came to my parents’ home and soon afterward, my dad began attending the support group meetings religiously.
I cannot fully express how much TAP has meant to our entire family over the years. It gave my Dad a setting in which he felt comfortable being around others, without feeling self-conscious about his speech difficulties. He looked forward to those get-togethers and continued to attend support groups long after his post–stroke improvements had plateaued. I attended a support group meeting with him when visiting from out-of-state, and I will never forget how much I learned in that short time. Up to that point, I had generally tried to finish my Dad’s sentences when he had word-finding trouble, thinking that I was helping him feel less frustrated. But I learned that by completing his sentences and filling in words, I was indicating to him that I did not believe he could do it on his own. I was not showing confidence in his ability to learn and grow and improve. This knowledge transformed my interactions with Dad, and I was able to convey to him that I had confidence in him.
He regained his language skills to the degree that if you did not know him, you may not even notice his occasional word-finding difficulty. But he still depended on TAP for support and camaraderie, and that was invaluable. He continued to attend meetings for over 15 years, until the pandemic occurred. As I write this, my heart is breaking because my Dad passed away in July. I am still coming to grips with this enormous loss.
The most amazing thing happened, because last week, I got a call from Maura, who is still following up on those long-time members of her “family”. It was as if she had sensed our loss. She shared her memories of both of my parents, and it was medicine for my soul. It has given me an opportunity to express the gratitude of my entire family for the amazing support we have received for 18 years, from TAP. I know my Dad is looking down with approval of my sharing his (and our) story.
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From the Home Office
12 Days of TAP provides you, our Triangle Aphasia Project Unlimited family, an opportunity to embrace the WHY of what we do. For 12 days, we share stories of those impacted by aphasia.
Aphasia can be a devastating impairment resulting in social isolation, depression and disengagement from the passions and purpose of an individual’s life. These stories demonstrate what happens when hope, determination, purpose and engagement are returned.
Our ability to provide accessible, affordable programming for individuals with aphasia and their families is a result of the generosity of our donors. Today, we ask that you continue supporting TAP by sharing these stories to build an understanding of life with aphasia and consider making a donation.
Thank you for your faith in our organization and for supporting the 12 Days of TAP!
Ways to Donate
- Text “tapholidays” to 50155
- Visit aphasiaproject.org to make a one-time donation
- Join our Ice Breaker Club to become a monthly donor
- Donate on our Facebook Fundraiser and share with your friends
- Print and clip the form below and mail a check
- Make a donation of stock; email us for more information